Thanks for nothing

Here’s the scene from my credit union this morning:

I am pretty sure I know what’s happening. And I’m none too pleased about it. What are those guys doing on the scaffolding, you ask? They’re updating the building facade to reflect the credit union’s new logo. To be perfectly clear, they are updating the credit union’s new logo—from which I will receive exactly zero economic or psychic benefit—in lieu of giving me additional interest on the balance in my checking account or waiving the incremental fees they charge me for doing typical bank things.

This isn’t exactly how the credit union frames what it’s doing, of course. According to the email I received about this updated logo, the “fresh new look” is intended to celebrate the credit union’s commitment to its members and to the communities it serves. Well, 🎉. How much do you think this entire rebranding cost? I’ve worked in enough companies that have gone through this same process enough times to know that it was not cheap. We’re talking I-should-start-a-marketing-and-branding-company not cheap.

And that’s not even including the internal cost. I imagine there was an employee steering committee, focus groups, ethnographic research around the old logo. Was this really for me and my fellow credit union members? According to the grammatically-challenged press release about the credit union’s new look, it doesn’t seem like we’re getting much of anything except for a truly terrible new tagline—Here For Every You. No, that’s not a typo. That’s actually their new tagline, soon to be plastered everywhere.

I’ll give you a dollar if you can read that launch page and tell me one tangible thing that I, a credit union member, receive from this new look.

I’ll wait right here.  

Still waiting.

It’s not just the credit union. Everywhere I turn, people are keeping up with the times, updating. Some days, when my street is full of general contractor trucks and the grocery store is “Open During Construction!” and I receive a notification that hey, my mobile line is ready for an upgrade, I think this—this is America’s national pastime. Heck, even I considered getting that bob haircut everyone seemed to have awhile back (final verdict: nope).

I’m not against updating per se. Dear sister-in-law, happy to tool around in your new BMW M550! Let’s change all our light bulbs! And ohmigod, Costco added a new frozen yogurt and churro dessert to its food court menu yaaaaaaas! Who doesn’t love a better mousetrap?

I’m just not a fan if your updating is coming out of my pocket and I’m not getting anything out of the bargain. Financial services companies, I’m talking to you. And updating a logo or two isn’t even the worst of their branding offenses. Guess who loves stadium naming rights? Yup, financial services companies.

You probably pay a couple hundred dollars a month for coverage in case a tree falls on your house. All good … and then you see State Farm paid $175 million for naming rights to the, er …, State Farm Arena. Which means it now has $175 million fewer dollars to pay out for those pesky insurance claims. Only, you know, its actual business.

Am I the only one annoyed by this? Is it because it is Spring Break and I am on a family road trip?

Over half of the Major League Baseball stadiums with corporate naming rights are named for a financial services company. The really grating part is that these companies—banks, insurance companies, mortgage companies, financial advisors—make their money from our money. Our deposits, our premiums, our fees.

Why don’t they do something for our benefit?